Screen Time…

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I am not sure where this mood struck me, maybe it’s the 4 children I have living under my roof. We have a lot of screens. I always thought I would be that mom that limited “screen time”. I am to a certain degree. It is kind of unspoken though. We don’t have screens, cell phones or Ipads at dinner. We are hungry people who focus on the meal and we like each other so we still talk to each other (they arent teenagers yet). My kids still play outside all summer so screen time is decreased tremendously! They never have a device in their face during those warm days. Nor can they find them to be honest.

My question really is for you all. What is the deal with the adults? I heard something the other day that sparked something in me. A co-worker of mine said people are actually not making memories because of screen time. They are relying solely on their devices to remember memories and store them for their brains. Could this be possible? I know I feel like it is possible. Our phones have replaced so many things.

I don’t even physically go into the grocery store anymore. That is a whole other article and it is AMAZING! Thank you Kroger Click-List! I am just curious, has anyone actually given any thought to not making memories because they take their phones with them everywhere and snap pictures of everything and they forget to program it into their brains?

I for one am a picture person. I love having them, looking back on them, royally suck at getting them printed, but ultimately LOVE them! Can I possibly be jeopardizing my own cognitive ability to recall certain events?

Asking for a friend!

I know being a mom of four children I am lucky I remember my pants some days. I pack entire lunches and forget them. I literally walk into rooms and dont know why in the world i went in there.

Exactly my version of laundry too!

Abrupt

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via Daily Prompt: Abrupt

When you think of the word abrupt you think of your entire world moving or shifting in a matter of seconds….well this is at least what I think of. It is one of those pivots I have talked about before. These moments where nothing will look, feel, sound, smell, or ever seem the same again. This happens sometimes so fast and abruptly you have to see these moments from hindsight. 

Yesterday was one of those days you were reminded of the word ABRUPT! We were picking up dinner and we had our youngest son with us. We learned that a close friend of the family lost their entire home in a house fire. I was so very sad for them. I started to reflect on my own family and my own home. I was thinking of their three children. I was thinking of how they just moved in. They moved into their new home the same time we moved into ours. It caused me to realize that life happens so fast and we don’t realize how fragile we are. We are sometimes so powerless when these abrupt things happen.

I started to ponder what it must feel like to lose absolutely everything and have to know that you will be starting over again. I know it probably wouldn’t be so bad with a husband and wife. I cannot imagine losing everything of my children’s though. In a matter of minutes you have lost years of memories, hard work, time spent, and investments you cannot get back. Yes, I realize it is just, “things”. A house is so much more though. Your home is so much more than wood, items you own, and concrete. Your home is who you are, the memories you keep, & the person you have grown from. Now, unless you are like my sister and you purge every other month and do not keep anything from your childhood or teenage years. She’s a freak of nature though. I need to be more like her- less hoarder, more purger.

Bottom line….. Abrupt happens in our life all of the time. Without these moments life would be boring and never, “happen”. These good and bad things come as fast as they go. We as humans deal with them, overcome them, & move on. This is what life is made up of. All these long monotonous moments, short abrupt moments (good & bad) how we handle those moments, & and back to our reg monotonous moments…the cycle continues.

Ohhh-possum

Homesteading Fun!

So, I did this thing last week and I rescued yet another wild living creature. Let’s pretend like the 4 human beings and numerous animals we already have aren’t enough to keep alive. I rescued 9, yes, I said 9 baby opossums!

Long story short, mom did not live through a traumatic trapping event and I felt the need to care for her young. I quickly fell in love with these little creatures. I am guessing through observation and what I have read these little guys are between 50-60 days old.

I am down to 2 babies to date and they have survived with me for 7 days so far. I went to our pet supplies store and bought puppy formula and I mix one teaspoon to 4 teaspoons of water into a small kitten bottle. I then use a eye dropper and feed them 2-3 droppers full at a time every 2-4 hours depending on the ferocity of their appetite.

Our local vet said they didn’t need to eat so frequently through the night. They have been making 5-6 hour stretches. Their eyes are completely open and they have their hair. These are apparently key in what I have read when it comes to survival without their mother.

They still can not regulate their own body temperature so I am using a water bottle and a rice bag to moderate their body temperate. I try to keep them the same temperature as myself throughout the day. So, as fun as this sounds, it is not! I go to lengths sometimes as wearing them inside of my shirt. Whatever it takes at this point. They both travel to work with me daily.

4-19-18

I hope you stick around and follow our journey on the road to survival for Polly and Peter. I will be sure to update their progress weekly!

(Picture 4-20-18)

4/26/18

Tomorrow the babies have been with me one week and two days. I cannot believe how much they have grown this far.

They are becoming more active and their feeding times are becoming more generous on me. They are eating anywhere between every 3-4 hours and 5-6 hours. I don’t feed them unless they are wanting their bottle of course. I never over feed and fill their tummy’s to the brim. I am still using a damp and warm towel to make them use the bathroom.

They are getting more of that course peppered hair and they clean their own coats now. They will also clean each other’s.

I am still keeping them inside of my sons winter hat during the day. I take them to work with me. I slide that down inside a purse just for them with their rice bag that is gently warmed. This is the easiest way to produce a “pouch-like” environment.

Chickens Chickens Everywhere….

Homesteading Fun!

So, we bought a new house and all we have ever wanted was a little farm with our chickens producing enough eggs to feed all six of us. Well…. it’s happening and I couldn’t be more excited!

We have 17 hens and we did have a rooster. He suffered the ill fate of the fox that keeps creeping around. We have also lost a couple of our hens. I guess that is part of the farming game. I don’t know. It is very sad if you ask me. My husband on the other hand, he says, “it is the name of the game”. We are learning though. Here are some of our insights into our latest chicken adventures.

We have 7 large hens who already lay (my husbands friend got us started with these girls) and we then got some baby chicks that we are hoping lay in the next 4-5 months. First order of business was to keep the babies alive and then introduce the two flocks.

In my mind all birds should live in peace. They seem sweet and innocent. I guess that is not true. Apparently there is a pecking order and the birds are hard core about it.

Bringing home the babes…. they were fun and grew quite quickly. We put them under a heat lamp in our garage until they were all feathered.

We tried to handle these girls as much as possible so they wouldn’t be difficult to catch.

We slowly acclimated them with our first flock of girls…we were told the older birds would peck their heads to gain the proper pecking order. (More terrible farm shenanigans)

When the weather broke and the girls were well feathered we would let both flocks out at the same time. This was just a guessing game for us. We tried to acclimate them daily. I didn’t want any turf wars going on.

The only down side to this was chicken shit literally everywhere….I mean everywhere! We love the free range idea. What I do not like is the constant fecal matter in random places around the house. Apparently that comes with the territory.

The Coop:

I love our coop…

My husband may have went to extremes with the coop. He felt they needed some space. I am so glad he did though. It is very roomy for them. It works perfectly for all of our girls.

He has a door on the back we pull down so we can just reach in and grab the eggs. It works so well when you don’t want to go into the coop to retrieve the goodies! The girls also have a run to the goat pen and a door to the outside to free range. It is the best of all worlds because we weren’t sure which would work best when a predator was near and we couldn’t be home to keep an eye on them.

Elixir Fixer-Frugal Motherhood Must Have!

Daily Prompts, Lifes Lessons

via Daily Prompt: Elixir

 

WINE! When I think of the word Elixir  I think of a potion or liquid that fixes a problem. Okay, I guess that could also be medicine. The first thing that came to my mother mind though was in fact, WINE! It would be my elixir of choice. It is also that type of thing that some people love or some people hate.  I am not a wine connoisseur by any means. With this being said, I am in fact a frugal woman. I also know that I have two wines of choice that are cheap and good!

The first one is my go-to wine. This is the wine I drink through the week when my children are making me bat shit! We all have those moments where we literally need a drink. We also still have to be a parent and cannot become shit faced on a Monday. Society frowns upon that type of thing when you’re a mom.  This is why I drink Arbor Mist! It is cheap, comes in all kinds of yummy flavors,w1 and it will not have you walking around like Bambi on ice three drinks in. It is a nice elixir for your “mom life” moments and will come in handy during a moment that your kids are running through the house like monkeys who just broke out of the zoo. Then they give you that look like that is typical behavior and they don’t know why your nervous breakdown face is surfacing!kid-being-an-adult-what-am-i-even-doing

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My next elixir of choice is a rather large bottle of white wine. This little gem is sold at Sam’s Club and probably any drug store. It is called Riesling.  I have seen a couple different versions of it and I myself became a fan when I needed a little stronger something but still didn’t want to  walk like it was first day in high heels. It is like 10.00 a bottle and clean and crisp sanity can be found in each amazing drop!schmitt-sohne-blue-bottle-clean-crisp-riesling-kabinett-mosel-germany-10394178

 

 

 

 

 

If you’re having a realllll shitty day and the wine just won’t cut it then grab you a bottle of kahlua this awesomeness and throw it over some ice, a splash of coke, and some milk. This drink will not disappoint and you can still feel like a good mom. It will be a subtle trip to happy town and I always enjoy this more when my husband is home. This is just in case I get a little Kahlua happy. This is my version of the White Russian without the vodka! It’s like Pringles you cannot have just one!

So from one bat shit mom to another, enjoy these when your sanity tank is running low. There is no shame in the elixir game. As long as you aren’t driving your kids around and shit.

Everyone Loves A Party…….

Lifes Lessons

This past weekend we had a party for my last baby. He is turning 1 on the 29th. I love having birthday parties for my kids. It’s one of those, “mom moments” I adore about being a mother. It was a lot of fun and I enjoyed his theme, “Wild One”, not the movie either.

While I very much enjoyed his party, I also thought to myself several times, “why the hell do we do all of this”? It is kind of ridiculous that we go to the lengths that we do. I can remember my parents got cake and ice-cream and your few family members came over and that was a party! Where did all of this hype come from when it comes to parties? Is it social media now? So I took a mental note after decorating for an hour at a high rate of speed that I was going to slow down this party. I was going to enjoy this day.

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As a mom I don’t feel like my kids have a party unless we have a theme, cake to match the theme, an entire day dedicated to said child, & of course personalized items for the party. It is exhausting! I feel like my kids deserve it though! I want them to be happy. I want them to enjoy these moments too.

The point of all of this is the bigger picture….it doesn’t have to be an all out event. The memories will still be made, the cake will be eaten, & your child will turn another year older. We as parents need to cut ourselves a break and enjoy the moments with them instead of trying to create more moments for them.

While I did create a themed and exciting birthday this year, I took the time to enjoy more little moments and not stress over any fine details. It was such a more relaxing party. I actually got to enjoy the people there and be in the moment with my kids. I loved it and enjoyed watching Wyatt enjoy his very first birthday!

 

When You Find The “HOLE” in Your Holy Matrimony…

Lifes Lessons, Uncategorized

Holy Matrimony….what the hell does this even mean? Like, is it “officially a Holy Marriage”?  Well, I am in constant assessment of my marriage and love life. Why?….. I have always wanted nothing more than to be a wife and mom. I was careful to find the man who adored me (most days). It was one of those things I had to have in order to be fulfilled and happy with the idea of what I had in my mind for my perfect relationship. It took me a while to get it right. I finally did and it has paid off.

Now, my relationship it is not perfect without any disappointments or hurt, pain, fear, etc. It is perfect in my mind because it’s a “working marriage”. This is what I see as two people constantly working toward making each other better and our life better together.  That doesn’t mean our marriage hasn’t had  what I like to refer to as, “relationship pot holes”. I have noticed there are actually “pot holes” in our life every where. What I have observed is that these holes are just like pot holes on an old dirt road. Pot holes are created by weather, seasons, and heavy traffic. If the water lays on the road too long over and over, a pot hole can be formed. Over time this hole can become deeper and wider. When there is more rain and freezing temperatures followed by warming temperatures, the hole grows.

If you care about this road then you will take the time to go back and fill these holes back up. You will fix your road. If you do not fix them then you spend more time swerving to miss the holes and damaging your vehicle then you do driving the straight and narrow. Eventually this road becomes so bumpy and hard to travel that you are absolutely miserable going down this road.

This is just like a relationship. We get busy in life, kids, work, etc. and we leave these holes in places in our marriage. We don’t pay much attention to them until one day we despise passing through or around this hole. We miss what was once there. We must go fix those holes. That may mean taking a little extra time to spend just talking with your spouse, making dinner together, going to bed together, or just making an effort to really ask how your spouse is doing and ask how you can make their life better.

Sometimes these holes get so large that you don’t know if you can repair them easily. It may take a lot of extra work. If this road is a road you enjoy traveling though, you will find a way to fix it. Ultimately, if you love your spouse and you want a good relationship then you will maintain the road consistently to travel a calm and happy path. If you don’t fix the road then one day you will have to find an alternate route to where you are going. It is all on perspective.

Happy Travels!

Acceptance

Daily Prompts, Lifes Lessons

via Daily Prompt: Acceptance

 

Today acceptance for me is the most difficult part about my day.

“Accept the unacceptable” ….is what I constantly tell myself.

Since I was very young, I have had an innate ability to remove toxic people from my life. I have had a very intuitive nature about me. I would be able to look at someone and know if they were good or bad for me. I was always able to steer away from heartache this way….until I wasn’t.moving-doesnt-mean-that-you-forget-about-things-it-just-means-you-have-to-accept-what-happen-and-continue-living-divorce-quote I have now, due to recent events, learned that acceptance is something you have to sometimes work for. Acceptance is sometimes the only thing standing in the way of your happiness. Before I found out my husband cheated on me, I thought he was wonderful. I thought he loved me the way I loved him. I thought he would always be my protector.

He acted in no way like the man I thought he was. I had to accept he was not who I fell in love with. Then I had to accept the fact that my life was forever changed. For me, I felt this instant draw for some type of normal in my life. I began clinging to him. I wanted nothing more than to just have him near. Odd, you would think I should hate him.  Parts of me did. Parts of me understood him and understood people make mistakes. What I had a hard time accepting he was never going to love me at the same caliber I loved him. Sure, he says he is a changed man, I do believe he is sorry and has changed. The realist in me said he couldn’t change over night. Not unless he finally found the same love for me I had for him. Can I really believe this right now though? I wanted him to rescue me and my broken heart. He wasn’t interested in that. He wanted me to move on and forget about his short comings. There was no rescuing me, no endearing motivation, not much of anything really. He just wanted me to accept the fact that he messed up, move on, & go back to normal.

I have learned acceptance has no timeline, rules, boundaries, or options. You either accept the unacceptable or suffer in your own miserable being. Acceptance means a lot of things to a lot of people. It changes your perception and alters your entire self. What you do with your acceptance will make or break you.

Stupid People Piss Me Off…

Rants

Now, I realize that some people ignore these things in life. For me, these are the most impossible things in life that you just cannot ignore. I am 31 years old and since I can remember, the following items have irritated my soul!th205A5QNP

  1. Parents dropping their kids off at school No, I am not talking about the normal parents. I am talking about the f*cking helicopter parents that pull up to drop off their kid and no one has their shit ready. Like, did you not realize you were going to school today? That stop was not a surprise. Have your shit ready!!! When I throw my kids out it’s practically just a slow down. I am OCD with them having their shit ready. I don’t need to be that parent. Let’s not hold up the progress! Then there is always my favorite parent the, “STOP AND WATCH” parent. The parents who stop to watch their kid walk allllll the way into the school. For F*cks sake! There are trained professionals retrieving your precious cargo. They get paid to do that shit! They got it! Get on with your day!
  2. Loud Eaters     I CANNOT stand a loud eater! You know those people who chew gum like a cow chews cud! OMG! Makes me lose my shit. The best is when my husband hands all of our children gum and then puts them in the car with me. I go INSANE! They spit that shit right back out that window going down the highway. Ain’t nobody got patience for that!
  3. Slow Drivers Using Passing Lane    To all the f*cktards who feel the need to cruise in the passing lane like they have nowhere to be and they are out for their Sunday drive, its a PASSING LANE! Get the hell over! I am not on your ass because I don’t like you. I am on your ass because you are an idiot who needs to get the f*ck over! Move! Continue your Sunday drive in the right lane.
  4. NIBSHITS! This one is a biggie. I cannot stand those people who just want to know everyone’s business. Then, not only do they make your business their business, they feel the need to comment, gossip, put their ideas and arguments into your business. No, Asshat, if it doesn’t concern you then be happy. Be happy you don’t have to deal with my life and deal with your own shit.
  5. Close Talkers  Do I need to say much about this? Back the f*ck up! Your space is not my space. I like to be at arms length. I don’t want to taste your breath! Frikin people! Ugh!
  6. Parents of “THOSE KIDS”   We all know these kids and we have all seen their parents. These are the kids that are throwing shit in the restaurant and their parents are too busy texting everyone and taking a damn selfie. They don’t care what their kid is doing as long as they are left alone. These kids are the kids who beat the shit out of the good kids in school and their parents come to school and cry about how they did it because they were bullied. No, your kid had no parenting and they are now an asshole! Facts!
  7. Crowding Check Outers I cannot stand people who creep up your asshole when you are checking out! I am getting my money out and I am going to buy my shit. Give me space! Back up! Your spot will not be taken, the cashier will still check you out. Contrary to popular dumb ass belief, you are not entitled to enter my space just because you feel I am finished with my transaction.

Maybe it is my short temper or maybe I have an abundance of common sense.  I just know the “normal population” probably feels about the same way I do about 80% of this shit. I don’t know, maybe if you are the asshat that does this stuff, consider this your public service announcement.

Parenting Without Prescriptions!

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Today I just have to extend my sincerest apologies to my entire household. They are sometimes the reason for my madness and they are sometimes the “catch all” and they don’t have a damn thing in it. Today it was a little bit of both.

This post is literally just to make the hot mess parents feel better about their life. I literally feel as though I need medication to deal with my temper some days. Then there are days that I think to myself that it is no wonder why I act like a f*cking crazy person.

Hopefully this post makes those other parents feel better about losing their shit on a daily. I have this undeniable ability to go bat shit in about 2.5 seconds. My husband likes to talk about my lack of patience and I like to chalk it up to everyone around me acting like ass hats. I have 5 other people living in my house. They are my people….my family…the humans I keep alive. Well, my husband and I keep alive but,  more or less it’s my job. So, when they are lagging behind acting like they have never lived in our home before, forgetting our typical routines, showing their “Goldfish side”, I get a little hot! (Side note: I refer to my children as goldfish periodically because it is like one trip around the damn bowl and they already forget what the hell they are doing!)

Our 6 year old for example, God love him, he is the tender heart. He is so thoughtful and caring and when he feels as though he has hurt your feelings he just crumbles. He is such a dear.

On the flip side….. he is always is slow motion.

I refer to his speed as, “sloth mode”.

I cannot express the rate at which my blood pressure rises when I am getting this kid out of the door, especially in the morning before school! What parent would not need medication to deal with this behavior? He is not doing it because he is malicious. That is just him. He cannot help the way he was made but damn, he could sure as hell use a tune up.

This morning we had 20 minutes until we needed to be out of the door. Now, you moms that get this time crunch know, you don’t f*ck with the morning routine because we are literally operating minute by minute and have that shit down to a science. My CHILD, my precious, tender hearted sloth of a child, eats one flippin’ lucky charm at a time and to make matters worse, he will ask when he is done what I want him to do! Like really son….we have been at this shit now for over half the school year and you are in your underwear and your hair looks like you left that hurricane booth at the mall. GET YOUR DAMN CLOTHES ON! That is what happens next! Clothes! …… Now!…. Jesus!

Then my favorite part of the morning comes…..tears…because he is emotional. OMG! Then my husband walks by with….”my aren’t we cranky this morning”. OMG! I CANNOT EVEN! There you have it….That is officially when bat-shit mode takes over and I consider medication to deal with my life. (Not really seriously thinking on it but, the thought has crossed my mind. Would it be such a bad thing?)

 

Our 5 year old, well his little ass lays in bed until the last possible second. Today was picture day. All I wanted was him to get up, put his shit on, and I needed to get him ready. He was moving about like the 6 year old. He is just the complainer and the needy one. Does anyone else have that, “needy child”? This is the kid who cannot function without assistance and has something wrong with them all the time. They are the, my head hurts, my knee hurts, can I have a drink, OMG I have to pee, KID! Makes me crazy!

Then we have Ruby, she is 8, she is sweet. She is kind of like Lucas, the 6 year old. They are both people pleasers. She just can’t hear. No, she doesn’t have a condition. She is my, “huh?” kid. She can never hear you. You have to repeat yourself 500 times. Then, if she feels like you are getting irritated and she doesn’t want to piss you off by saying huh again, she will just look at you with that deer in the headlight look. Oh it makes for a very interesting morning.

We cannot forget our baby. He is almost 1. He is the spoiled one. I mean he has 5 other people in his house that literally cater to his every need. He wants for nothing….until everyone is busy. He is…UP …MY….ASS!  He wants to be held, cuddled, entertained constantly. If you don’t have time for that, well then you’re f*cked! He will make your life miserable. You can listen to the song of his people which happens to be a very loud battle cry that makes you want to drown yourself in his bath water!

I know, it seems as though I hate my children and I truly love them dearly. They are my world. 98% of the time I do embrace it, as my husband says. The other 2% I am literally calling them asshats in my head and considering a prescription to deal with my anger. Then I think, is it me? Maybe it is them? Maybe it is normal to have this issue with little people. They are little people after all. Is this what my mother used to warn me about? WTF?

So for the moms like me….you are not alone. For the rest of you who do not fall into this category….you’re a freak of nature or medicated. You are probably those people that wash your laundry, fold it, and put it away in the same day. I don’t understand you. You don’t speak my language. Go you though!

Disclaimer: DSC_0907_edited

(Yes, I call my kids ass hats. They are sometimes ass hats. It’s ok. I don’t literally call them that when they are acting like ass hates. I cringe, grit my teeth, & talk to them like a normal mother. I only call them ass hats in my head. If you haven’t called your child an obscene name in your head, you are lying!)

 

More like this post….

https://unpolishedperfectionblog.wordpress.com/2016/02/01/confessions-from-that-wife