Now, I realize that some people ignore these things in life. For me, these are the most impossible things in life that you just cannot ignore. I am 31 years old and since I can remember, the following items have irritated my soul!
- Parents dropping their kids off at school No, I am not talking about the normal parents. I am talking about the f*cking helicopter parents that pull up to drop off their kid and no one has their shit ready. Like, did you not realize you were going to school today? That stop was not a surprise. Have your shit ready!!! When I throw my kids out it’s practically just a slow down. I am OCD with them having their shit ready. I don’t need to be that parent. Let’s not hold up the progress! Then there is always my favorite parent the, “STOP AND WATCH” parent. The parents who stop to watch their kid walk allllll the way into the school. For F*cks sake! There are trained professionals retrieving your precious cargo. They get paid to do that shit! They got it! Get on with your day!
- Loud Eaters I CANNOT stand a loud eater! You know those people who chew gum like a cow chews cud! OMG! Makes me lose my shit. The best is when my husband hands all of our children gum and then puts them in the car with me. I go INSANE! They spit that shit right back out that window going down the highway. Ain’t nobody got patience for that!
- Slow Drivers Using Passing Lane To all the f*cktards who feel the need to cruise in the passing lane like they have nowhere to be and they are out for their Sunday drive, its a PASSING LANE! Get the hell over! I am not on your ass because I don’t like you. I am on your ass because you are an idiot who needs to get the f*ck over! Move! Continue your Sunday drive in the right lane.
- NIBSHITS! This one is a biggie. I cannot stand those people who just want to know everyone’s business. Then, not only do they make your business their business, they feel the need to comment, gossip, put their ideas and arguments into your business. No, Asshat, if it doesn’t concern you then be happy. Be happy you don’t have to deal with my life and deal with your own shit.
- Close Talkers Do I need to say much about this? Back the f*ck up! Your space is not my space. I like to be at arms length. I don’t want to taste your breath! Frikin people! Ugh!
- Parents of “THOSE KIDS” We all know these kids and we have all seen their parents. These are the kids that are throwing shit in the restaurant and their parents are too busy texting everyone and taking a damn selfie. They don’t care what their kid is doing as long as they are left alone. These kids are the kids who beat the shit out of the good kids in school and their parents come to school and cry about how they did it because they were bullied. No, your kid had no parenting and they are now an asshole! Facts!
- Crowding Check Outers I cannot stand people who creep up your asshole when you are checking out! I am getting my money out and I am going to buy my shit. Give me space! Back up! Your spot will not be taken, the cashier will still check you out. Contrary to popular dumb ass belief, you are not entitled to enter my space just because you feel I am finished with my transaction.
Maybe it is my short temper or maybe I have an abundance of common sense. I just know the “normal population” probably feels about the same way I do about 80% of this shit. I don’t know, maybe if you are the asshat that does this stuff, consider this your public service announcement.